Too Much! Helping your Child to Make Choices and Remain Focussed

Does your child flit quickly from one thing to another without stopping to play with anything for long?

Do they leave a trail of toys all over the house?

Do they seem to prefer tipping out boxes of toys rather than playing with them?

Do they have an enormous collection of toys and yet can find ‘nothing to do’?

The reason could well be that there is just too much!

Preschoolers are still learning how to make choices and so too much choice can be overwhelming for under-5’s.

A small selection of toys makes it easier for your child to choose and the ability to make choices is an essential skill that will help your child to function successfully in Reception class once they start school. In school your child will be typically be one of a class of thirty children and their time will be split between working in a small group with an adult; working with an adult as part of a whole class group; and working and playing independently – without adult attention or support – whilst the adults are busy teaching other groups of children. They will have less adult attention than they may have been used to in nursery or preschool, and a lot less adult attention than they will be used to getting at home, which means that they will need to spend time choosing activities for themselves, without adult help.

You can help your child to become confident at making choices by limiting the number of toys they have available to choose from.

Too many toys to choose from leads to frustration or to the dreaded ‘dumping’ of piles of toys without ever really playing with any of them.

Too many toys – and therefore too many choices – is the reason why children can be surrounded by toys but claim to have ‘nothing to do’.

Your child will learn more from their toys and enjoy their toys more with fewer options to choose from.

Having fewer choices will improve your child’s concentration as they will find it easier to focus on one toy at a time. They will engage with their toys on a deeper level, exploring and investigating. They will find new ways to use their toys and will play in more creative and imaginative ways.

All of this develops your child’s executive functioning skills (known as Characteristics of Effective Learning in the EYFS), which builds a solid foundation for successful learning later in life.

Open shelves with small sets of toys in baskets or on a tray can help to develop your child’s independence by reducing overwhelm and enabling your child to make choices from a small selection of available resources. An open toy shelf with a small selection of options also make it easy for your child to see where things belong so that it is easy for them to put toys back in the right places after use.

If you have ever researched the Montessori approach you may have heard about ‘toy rotation’. Rotating the selection of toys or activities available to your child not only reduces overwhelm and keeps their toy shelf fresh and interesting, it also enables you to keep your child’s toy selection relevant to their current skills & interests. Making sure that the toys on offer are matched to your child’s current skill level and offer just enough challenge without being too difficult or complicated for your child’s stage of development reduces the incidents of frustration that often occur when toys ‘don’t work’ or when they ‘can’t do it’, and also increases your child’s confidence and ability to play independently for longer periods.

Use these tips to arrange your child’s toys so that it is easy for them to choose, concentrate and focus on meaningful play:

• Rotate your child’s toys so that only a small selection of toys are available to play with at any one time.
• Pack the rest away and change them over every 2-3 weeks.
• If you have space, have a shelf where your child’s toys can be displayed in an organised and attractive way.
• Space the toys out on the shelf so that each toy or set of toys has its own space and it is easy to see where each one belongs
• If your child’s toys are normally kept in boxes, select just a few items to go in each box rather than full boxes that are tempting to tip out all over the floor.

Display toys in small collections with a purpose or theme in mind – for example

• a basket with a small set of blocks;
• a small collection of farm animals (around 4 or 5 is plenty) on a tray or in a basket;
• a set of 4 or 5 trains with a small selection of track, rather than a massive box of Brio;
• one or two dolls and a small collection of items for looking after baby rather than piles of random role play toys.

And finally, fewer toys, neatly displayed will make it easier for your child to tidy up after themselves as it will be easy for them to see where things belong, and they will not be overwhelmed by piles of toys to tidy away. Always expect your child to put their toys away when they have finished playing. This supports their natural desire for order in their environment and helps to develop characteristics of effective learning such as sequencing, planning, problem solving and visual memory.